Gratitude

I have so much to be thankful for this year.
God has blessed our family over and over despite what we deserve.
This is our gratitude tree that we made on Thanksgiving (my mother's idea!).
We all wrote on leaves things that we were grateful for.
It is amazing how much we focus on the bad things that are happening in our life and not on all the good that God is doing. I have really been trying the last couple of days to really think about all the good in the world and in my life.
I am so blessed. Not with material things, but blessed with the knowledge that God loves me and desires me. He runs to us with arms open wide even when we have turned our backs on him.
"Not only does He watch expectantly, God runs to us. He sees the repentant heart and the empty hands. He sees His child full of shame over lost riches and stupid choices. He sees the scars of our consequences. And He runs anyway. He covers the distance between us with His own strength.
....Strong arms underneath us....He takes our face in His hands. He calms our cries and speaks gentle words over us:
Forgiven.
Redeemed.
Accepted.
Loved.
Beautiful."
(Do you think I am beautiful, the question every woman asks - by Angela Thomas)

This is what I am most grateful for this year!

The new look!

Julia can officially see now! She got glasses last week...she really looks cute.
She is now in public school and loving it.
I am so proud of her. She has done so well adjusting to going to school.
She is also causing quite a stir at school.
She is engaging the kids in her class in a debate over Santa Claus.
She apparently informed them that Santa was not real and the true meaning of Christmas was Jesus' birthday.
She proceeded to prove her point by taking her bible to school and had the teacher read the story of the birth of Christ. I was impressed that the teacher read it.
She has already informed me that she will begin working on the Easter Bunny!

The Empty Silo

One of my favorite things about our house is the fact that we have this Silo at the entrance of our street. I can see if from our front yard.
It is neat to me that Spring Hill has kept most of these silos up around town. I think they add a unique charm to the area.
I have been thinking a lot about the Silo after walking down there and looking in. It is massive and empty. You can peek your head in at the bottom and see all the way to the top. Not a trace of grain or corn left in the bottom. Just bird droppings and feathers.
I am not really good at writing and making analogies...but here it goes. Just what I have been wrestling with the last week or so.
I feel a lot like that empty silo. In regards to my spiritual life that is.
I have the structure, I go to church, I have the knowledge, I used to be full of life and overflowing with God's presence, but I have allowed myself to empty. I have allowed all of the "grain" to pour out and part of me feels that there is nothing left but bird droppings.
However, unlike the silo that will not be useful again except to stand there and look interesting...I have a choice. I can choose to allow God to fill myself again.
It will take a lot of gardening, pruning, and watering to grow the grain to place in the silo. I am not real excited about the process. When we allow God to grow us it is often very painful and hard to accept.
I feel like I have taken the first step in allowing God to regrow me.
It has been painful, but I am starting to see a few seeds sprouting.
I am learning how to be still before God and trying to listen.
I need to be patient. I tend to expect God to fix me right now.
I know that corn/wheat takes time. It is a process. I am in process.